Trolls: The Nutty Peanut Gallery

000000002Over the last three years I’ve had the great pleasure of meeting with several hundred of the viewers of my Youtube channel. Many times it is planned into their vacation and they will arrive at the city I am living in at the time. Other times I have fit it into my itinerary when I happened to already be in transit and passing through their city. I’ve met a lot of my viewers by pure chance. On a ferry to Bohol, on a plane to Boracay, while shopping for groceries and even while I was on a date.

And it’s been a great experience. I enjoy hearing about what led them to a life in the Philippines and different situations they have encountered along the way. We will often talk over dinner, a beer or just standing out on a sidewalk.

Online, I would say that my correspondence with the viewers of my channel has also been very enjoyable. I’d say about 99% of the viewers have had something positive to say about whatever video they viewed. I’ve had many, many viewers ask for my advice on their personal situaton and later thanked me for my input.  Some have become good friends to this day that I see fairly regularly.

And then there is the 1%.  The ‘Peanut Gallery’.

I’d say that just about every day I get addressed by some newly, thrown-together fake account spewing some sort of accusation or hatred at me either through the Youtube comment section or my Facebook. And often it’s the same people with the same accusations, same profanities, same hatred.. all I have to do is read a sentence or two and I recognize it’s just another waste of bandwidth.

I don’t debate or argue with these people unless I’m really bored, which isn’t often. And even then I will make one reply and then ban them.  I’ve found there’s nothing productive that will come out of anything more than that.  The standard operating procedure I have is to simply Block them from my account and delete their comment from the Pending status. That’s it. I can block/delete comments much faster than they can create new accounts or type up another hateful message. It never takes up more than ten minutes of my day. Very easy-peasy.

Who are these people?

The simple answer to that is, “People with a lot of hatred and time on their hands.” Truly. If they had anything else more productive to do I suppose they would do it. Instead, they make me the center of their dark world. I represent, in their mind, all that is wrong in their life. All I can say to that is, “It must suck to be them.”

If I had to put these people into a group, based on what I’ve seen over the last 3 years, they would fall into three major groups;

1.) The “Grumpy Old Men” Group

People (almost always men, but a few women) from this group are old dogs who can’t seem to learn 001new tricks. They are set in their ways and, in real life I suppose they are accustomed to no one ever telling them they are wrong, much less proving it and leaving them speechless. These are people who will utter something as ignorant as, “All Filipinos can’t be trusted.” and then, if you correct them on their error regarding general statements, they are appalled at your correction and now.. they hate you. That easily, they hate you. They will harass you, slander you all because you proved them wrong in some online discussion. Once these air-bags gets offended, they just can’t let it go.

2.) The “Sour Grapes” Group

sourgrapesThese can be a younger crowd, but not limited to just the young and stupid. Haters from this group are guys who came to the Philippines (or just about any South-East Asian country) thinking they had the world by a string. They thought they were Brad Pitt and Mr. Moneybags all rolled into one. But then, they made every fatal mistake in the book due to their own pride.  After all, they didn’t see the need to ask anyone for advice.  The next thing you know, they are broke, broken-hearted, cheated by women any sane person never would have trusted and rather than take some personal accountability.. they choose to blame the entire country of the Philippines. (or Thailand, Vietnam, Samoa, Cambodia, etc.)

So when they stumble upon a video by some happy-go-lucky guy (like me, or any other vlogger having a great time in the Philippines).. they just go nuts. The mere existence of someone else who disproves their hatred of the country by having a great experience totally wreaks havoc with their own personal ‘reality‘ between their ears. Again, they won’t take personal responsibility for their own experience turning into a train-wreck, so they go on the attack of any expat enjoying his life in the Philippines. They hate his happiness. They hate his cute girlfriend. They hate his fun vacations. They hate his joy. They hate his great relationship. Because it all proves that HE was the problem. Not the country. Not Filipinas. He was the problem but he can’t face that fact. So, he chooses to discredit and slander those who succeeded where he failed.

3.) The “Bad Wiring” Group

Haters from this group are truly their own worst enemy. They need therapy. They need drugs that only a licensed psychologist can prescribe. These are people who live in their own, bizarre fantasy world where (a) They are always right, (b) They are always the victim and (c) They apply a double-standard but cannot see the contradiction in doing so.

The nonsense I get from these people, I don’t take so personally. The reason is because their whole life is one long, slow train-wreck. I am not the first person they’ve fixated all their hate on, and I’ll likely not be the last. These people have a history of anti-social behavior that goes back for decades, even to childhood. They can’t hold a long-term, healthy relationship with the opposite sex. They can’t function in social situations without quickly becoming the designated “ass”. They can’t even interact with others in a group setting online. With social media the way it is, these type of people find themselves quickly blocked out from any online groups because they are so toxic and offensive to everyone involved. They expect everyone else to put up with their offensive rants, yet they are so thin-skinned when it comes to facing some truthful criticism in return.  They can dish it out, but they can’t take their own medicine. (refer again to the “double-standard” trait.)

I can’t emphasize enough, these people are incapable of seeing their own duplicity and toxicity. They truly think they are some sort of one-man champion with the entire world against them, “for no reason”. They can’t see that it is them who starts each and every incident of contention with others. They are mentally blind to it. They will think nothing of passing slander on a person, say filthy things about someone’s wife or girlfriend.. and then the next moment expect that person to have a civil conversation with them and treat them in a respectful manner, on their terms! They are THAT far removed from the social norm.  They are big on demanding respect, but never have any for others.

The Good News

The good news is (a) You don’t owe any of these 1% people a single moment of your time and (b) Their leostrutoriginalmindset and lifestyle is their own punishment, whether they realize it or not.

I don’t have to have these 1% haters as friends. I don’t need to meet with them.  I don’t even need to send them a holiday card.  Why would I bother? I am not interested in spending time with ego-maniacs, people in denial or crazy people. There are way too many other people in this world who are positive, outgoing, intelligent and entertaining to waste any time trying to placate a person who thinks and behaves like an ignorant beast.

As time goes on, call it karma or call it reaping what you sow.. but these people are like self-destructive black holes. It’s bad enough they will make their own existence miserable, there’s no need to be included in their personal, little crazy-circus.

Answering Common Accusations Made Against Me, Personally

Over the years, I’ve just about heard it all. If there’s a way to distort the truth, haters are all over it and spewing it anywhere they think someone will listen. Here is a short list and rebuttal to some of the accusations slung my way, simply for enjoying my life in the Philippines;

“Reekay is living with an under-age girl and is going to get thrown in jail for it.”

As of this date (April, 2016), I have been in a faithful, exclusive relationship with my girlfriend, who happens to be 23 years old. She was 21 when we met. Not 17, not 16.. but 21. This is how desperate these hateful people are that they will flat out LIE despite my relationship being public knowledge. Her family is happy about the relationship, she’s happy, I’m happy. But as I mentioned before, some people just cannot handle seeing other people happy in life.

“Reekay is passing bad information, saying that foreigners can own a business in the Philippines.”

This one makes me laugh. Especially coming from someone who eats at nothing but franchises owned by foreign corporations. 🙂 How else can I put this except to say that the plain truth is; foreigners can and have been running businesses in the Philippines for quite some time. Restaurants, hotels, resorts, motorcycle parts shops, BPO services.. the list is long of foreigners from South Korea, China, Japan, USA and UK who do business in the Philippines. I personally know quite a few individuals who have businesses in the Philippines. For someone to accuse me of “passing bad information” because I stated that foreigners do own businesses here is nothing short of ignorant. Any expat who wants to start a business in the Philippines can get plenty of information on the process and requirements at this Link 
or simply by doing a Google search on, “foreign owned business philippines requirements“.

“Reekay is just a ‘sexpat’, he’s only here for the girls.”

As I’ve already mentioned, I’ve been in a monogamous relationship with only my girlfriend, and this has been for the last 16 months straight. Having a long-term relationship does not make me a ‘sexpat’. Having a younger girlfriend does not make me a ‘sexpat’. If I was truly here, “just for the girls”, here is what I have to say about that;

If I was only here for a multiple number of female encounters, I would not limit myself to one woman for more than a year by being in a relationship. That’s just basic common sense. If I wanted variety in my social/dating life, I’d remain fully single and date whoever I wanted, when I wanted, as often as I wanted.

Secondly, if I was single and dating different women.. so what? That’s what men do when they are single, they date. They might date a lot or a little, but single men enjoy being around single women. If I were living in the USA, I’d be dating different women. People do that all the time. There’s nothing nefarious or criminal about having an active social life.  But, from the perspective of a hateful person who can’t successfully interact with women in a positive manner, it’s not surprising they resent that someone else is having an active social life. That just reeks of one thing; Jealousy.

In summary, the Peanut Gallery is and always has been a 1% collection of malcontents who want to tear everyone else down to their own miserable level. Their life sucks and they know it. Seeing other people enjoy their life, to them, is like salt in the wound. Why? Because they see themselves as a ‘victim‘.. not the reality of living a life that is the result and consequences of their own anti-social behavior. As I mentioned before, “It must suck to be them.”

Well, it’s been another fantastic day. I spent my day doing what I enjoy and I’ll end my evening the same way. In closing, I’ll leave you with a piece of reasoning that I live by;

Life is hard enough. I don’t have time for those who try to make it harder.”

Reekay
www.seetheph.com

philippines survival guide advice expats

Author: Reekay

After 49 years living in Southern California, USA, I decided to move to the Philippines despite never having been here before. In July, 2012, I took a leap of faith and transplanted myself to the amazing Philippines. I am a single man taking an honest look at all that the islands here have to offer, one day at a time. I hope you find my LBTSea site informative, entertaining and hopefully a bit of each. 🙂 Be sure to visit the Forum and other parts of what the site has to offer. Browse around and be sure to sign up for updates via email. Enjoy!
— Reekay

20 comments

    1. There have been several, so that particular one is nothing special. Same nonsense, different person. ha! None of these petty clowns deserve any traffic from me, or anyone. 🙂

  1. “Brad Pitt & Mr Moneybags all rolled into one.” You put a little poetic stuff in your narrative!

    Grumpy Old Men, Sour Grapes, Bad Wiring folks.

    You come up with the neatest categories.

    I enjoy your writing….keep it up. I like to write but I can’t put it out day after day like you do!

    1. I miss writing. 🙂 I plan to do much more this year since last year I mostly focused on video. Though I’ll be continuing that as well. So much to do in each day!

  2. I wouldn’t put to much time, thought or effort into these clowns. A lot haven’t even being to the Philippines, or they have gone there for a short period of time and got burnt through their own stupidity.

    To be honest, if I had the financial capacity I would move there today and setup a little two-tier (dual market) business. The only thing that I really didn’t like there was the constant humidity. Coming from a much cooler climate it was pretty rough on the system for the first month.

    We never got to the islands, would have loved to, Maybe next time, who knows we may catch up for a visit!

    1. Hopefully things will work out and you can do your thing here in the future. PH isn’t for everybody, but for those who do like it, it’s a relaxing gig most of the time. 🙂

  3. I always consider the source in a person…. I love the odd look on their face when you tell them, ” These aren’t the Droids your looking for, move along”. Have a great day, Reekay!!

    1. Hehehe.. yep. 🙂 My Mom used to say (when I was a kid), “If a crazy person doesn’t like you, just remember.. they are crazy.” She had a lot of great sayings as I grew up. Another one was, “If someone looks at you, giving you an ugly look on their face, maybe that’s the only face they have.” 🙂

      Point being, as you said, “consider the source”. I take to heart more the words my family who would speak with me in private than the public rants of a nutjob hiding behind an anonymous account with no photo that I’ve never met.

  4. through your YouTube channel you become a public figure and people get a opinion about you. this can never be the right one because they do not really know you. and bad things sell better than good ones. so you can better accept it. i hope you get something out of it money or a good feeling. i have to say i enjoy your thing. but i am so jealous of people that make it there hahahahaha. but not i a way i try to take it away from you but wish it where me. greetings from the Netherlands

    1. I see what you’re saying. Prior to starting this blog or the YT channel, for years prior to coming to the PH I have been writing articles on social issues ( http://www.lifegoeson.net ). So it’s no surprise to me that that moment a person makes a public statement, the malcontents come out of the woodwork. I could say, “The sky is blue, what a wonderful day.”, and it wouldn’t be long before someone disagrees with me, and then makes personal attacks to emphasize their point. That’s just how petty some people’s lives are.

      I hope you do make it here to the PH, or Bali or anywhere in the tropics. I can’t say the PH is “for everybody”, but it’s been good for me.

  5. The problem is YOU WANT people to make you the center of their “dark world” as you call it. Without a bunch of followers, you wouldn’t make any money on YouTube, etc. However, you want it to be on your own terms and with ONLY people that agree with you. Ridiculous, at best.

    I’m sorry that some people don’t agree with every move you make, but seems pretty hypocritical to even write this article to complain about them. I guess this is one article I don’t agree with. Seems a little childish. But sometimes you do have good advice. Guess it was a bad day.

    1. I share my experiences and observations, in video and writing, because I couldn’t find helpful information on life in the Philippines five years ago when I was doing my own research to come here. These days, lots of other vloggers/bloggers are available. Whether you can handle it or not, I happen to be one of the major voices in the expat community. That was never my goal, people simply find my material either helpful or entertaining. If you were to scan my comments you will inevitably see that I allow people to post comments even if they don’t agree with me. (yours is a perfect case in point) Meanwhile, 99% of the comments I get are positive and encouraging.

      Why does that upset you so much? Hmm. Now there’s something to think about.

  6. I just discovered you today. I watched your 4 categories video and read this article. I really like your analytical style. Please continue. Wish you all the success.

    1. Thanks. My goal this year is to do more of a balance between video and writing. I spent all of last year only on video. More stuff to come. 🙂

  7. Hi Henry, my name is Ollie and I have been following your writings and videos now for a little over 3 years. First from the US and now for 3 month from here in the PH. I followed some of your trails in Cebu, Tagbilaran, Panglao, Siquijor and now I settled here in Sibulan. I got very tired of staying in hotels after 4 weeks, even I only spent 3 of them in hotels and one week with a Pinoy friend in Cebu. Everything you talk about is exactly the way it is, at least the few little things I have been able to verify in that short period of time. You look at everything with a grain of salt just as I want you to and take a look behind the curtain of the public PH life, and then you explain it, with wit, in a down to earth language. I’m sure there is a language barrier to some people if english is not your first language just as it is for me. I laugh everyday when I talk to my Visayan boyfriend and he translates visayan into english to explain stuff to me. One of my favorite sentences is ‘I cook you’ when he wants to make dinner. He will learn the english language and the german/american lifestyle from me, as I will learn visayan and the Pinoy way from him. I turn 50 today and came to the USA from Germany 22 years ago, where I had to built a new life, now I will try to do the same here. I had great support from my Ex-wife and her family in Florida and I think I have the same here from my boyfriend and his family. I don’t think you can make it here without some kind of pinoy support, unless you have unlimited funds and live in some expat community with maids, gardener and a driver. May it be your live in partner or at least a good filipino friend or two. Especially since everything here is whom you know, or at least it helps a lot. But that’s just my opinion.
    Anyway after reading your Peanut gallery post I had to finally write to you and Introduce myself and tell you what a great job you do, at least for me, and especially all of that for free. I hope google pays you a few bucks for all of that hard work you do, but you obviously enjoy it a lot as well.
    I was sure I will run into you someday here in Negros or some other Island, but since I rarely go out unless the Honeycomb for the occasional coffee or beer if I have to wait for someone or once or twice a month to Why Not or Revive to dance, now I am thinking if you have no plans for after the brownout on Sunday 4/24 you are welcome to put Lyn on the scooter and stop by at the karaang bulangan in Sibulan proper to celebrate the old man’s birthday with some Lechon and the usual pinoy fiesta stuff. Not sure if I can get the KTV machine going, but I’m sure someone will figure that out if they want it bad enough. I don’t do KTV since I am a bad singer (unless I want everybody to leave, haha). Guests are mostly filipino, hope that is ok since that’s what I enjoy (Drama free for the most part). So let me know and I give you directions how to get here. We would sure love to have you guys.

    Ollie

    Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better. ( A.E. )

    1. thanks for the good words. Lyn is currently working so I’ll have to check with her schedule. If I can I’ll try to make it. Drop me a message at my FB and next time you’re in Duma I’m sure we can meet up so you can tell me about how your experience has been so far in great detail. Link to my FB is;
      https://www.facebook.com/reekay.inph

  8. Quite happy to hear you intend on writing more. I’ve always enjoyed your very organized and articulate vlogs. But at the ripe old age of 63, I’ve always preferred reading to watching/listening. And your writing is as well-done as your vlogging (possibly with a touch more edge than your vlogging – and I enjoy an edge at times). Either way, keep up the enjoyable and entertaining communicating.

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