Author: Reekay V.
Since 2012 I’ve been traveling through various islands of the Philippines as a full-time Expat and spent 1999 living in Vietnam.
Share with me my ongoing adventures of life in the Philippines. Hopefully you find my observations helpful in your own adventures.
— Reekay
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Well, good advice, but…
There’s always a but.
Story from two close friends, D and N.
D had a very nice girlfriend and he was border line abusive with her, and when she reacted, D terminated the relationship.
After 6 months N meets D’s ex girlfriend and they start a nice relationship that lead to marriage and now they have a beautiful daughter.
I see nothing wrong with that since N was very serious and respectful to his former friend and his now wife.
Only borrow what you’re prepared to lose. If you give someone $50/£50 and they don’t pay it back, look at it as the best thing that person ever done for you, as in they can never ever call again for a loan, and don’t forget to tell everyone else what said person has done to you.
These are great rules for meeting a new person in any country.
Instead, your title should read “ What to watch out for with other expats” You’re not going to teach proper etiquette to someone who’s dodgy to begin with. There are many more than three.
I’m assuming if you went to your friend and asked his permission (in advance, before you talk to her) to go after you’re friend’s ex & he says yes, that’s OK?
How in the Nine Hells do grown-azz men get into these positions and have these problems? On the first point, ok… I get it. Some people are nosy and need to be put in check. But chasing women in that way seems kinda desperate. Aren’t they embarrassed? As for borrowing money like that, how do you get to that stage in life, be financially secure enough to become an expat, and still only have the planning skills of a seventh grade girl? I’d be so embarrassed as a man to be seen in any of these situations in any country. It just seems like the expat community would contain higher quality people.
‘Nice to hear a perspective other than my own and get the chance to understand how others might perceive something.
I see it as my job to look after myself and make sure that my needs are cared for.
On a deeper level, I believe that we are equally responsible for the circumstances we experience, so I’m not likely to be dragged into someone’s drama.
Who was it that said “Neither a borrower nor a lender be?” Good advice… At least in terms of friends and family.
I learned the hard way to only “loan” money to friends up to the amount I am willing to give that particular person as a gift, and always tell them its a gift when you hand it to them. That way the friendship doesn’t get ruined when they don’t repay the money. If they complain that the amount is less than what they were asking for, I remind them that I am offering them a gift, and if they don’t want it, that’s okay they don’t have to take it.
But shes your EX get over it its all about your own insecurities well thats my take on it
TL; DW
Don’t be a piece of shit or overstep your bounds. Have common sense
It’s common sense advice that should not have to be given. But you are right if someone has to be reminded that’s a red flag!
That first pic… Gavin MacLeod was an expat?
Good advice, thanks.
It’s the unshaven angry alcoholic expats that bash Thais and Thailand that I stay away from… Pretty sure you have them in the Philippines too. 🙂
I been here 7yrs., know good number of expats from different lands & surprised that almost every one of them so far have been cool guys.
My thing is once YOU break off a relationship then just let it go & move on. My asawa had a couple foreign b/f who didn’t take much interest in her it seems until she married me. Then the 2 started social media BOOO HOOOS saying she was the best, etc.,etc. We both laugh about how once her life moved forward these bozo’s get consumed with jealousy/envy.
Only 3? One that drives me crazy are US politics and those who like to bash other peoples’ country of origin. Just rude people who traveled halfway around the world to make new enemies.
Fortunately I live in a gated community with armed guards and entry pass requirements.
If I’m into a chick, sorry buddy I will kiss our friendship goodbye. Not for any chick but only one I’d be prepared to commit to. That means I gotta be ready to die for her. I don’t run for any woman.
I never lend money. I rarely interact with Expats. I didn’t come to Asia to recreate what I had in Canada.
I’d add one more. DON’T EVER BELITTLE YOUR FILIPINA OR TREAT HER BADLY IN PUBLIC.
I don’t hang out with expats and dont even know any here or see any around my area..im in the PH..why would I want to do that!
I avoid all expats in the Phil, save a lot of trouble. I’ll be friendly on the surface, when I encounter one, but I don’t want to be around them.
Rule 4, don’t bring woke BS out here. The wokeness and third wave feminism is one of the main reasons the West is in decline. If you like wokeness then stay in the West. Don’t bring that crap out here.
Same with a woman! If I don’t even know her and she starts telling me some sob story she’s not getting a dime from me. If I am not invested in them as a friend or a possible partner then coming to me for money you have become one of the many bums on the street begging strangers for money in my head and I will not only pass you by but I will block you and ignore you.
Basically common sense. I hate borrowing from my own relatives, sure as shit ain’t asking strangers.
I was hoping this would be a how-to avoid other expats (without being a clueless jerk)
As an American, I have regretted getting at all friendly with every “old white American dude” so far.
Asking for money before you meet the person